Hidup... Ini... Aku

Hidupku….

Apa jadi….

Sendiri…..

Atau tetap berlari….

Mencari mimpi….

Tentang sandaran hati….

Hidupku…

Apa nyata….

Terbuka….

Atau membatu belaka…

Mengejar bintang di cakrawala…

Yang semakin tinggi di ufuk mata…

Hidupku….

Mungkin luka…

Air mata….

Tapi akan ku kembangi sedikit tawa…

Agar nanti akan ada….

Yang membuatku tersenyum dalam isak lara….

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The Past and Future

There is someone in my mind.... I try so hard to release myself from him, but i cant It feels like being tied up to the past I know i had to move on but its hard to do... The life i live right now is filled with him The long lost love which keeps coming back to my memory Everytime i remember you, my heart pinched... As if thousand of needles stabbing me.. He is gone now, but i cant erase him It feels like my heart is living in the past though my soul is at present When you miss someone, it's pinches hard Though we meet again someday... everything is different You changed, I changed... Nothing stays the same Though this is impossible... I really wants to love you in the past ......... Fahjr
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Just A Note About Myself

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It's been a long while since the last time I wrote something here. Things happened but not much has changed in my life. People still asking me, why do I hate commitment? Why do I stay where I am right now? Why don't I take risk and go out of the box, leave my comfort zone, stay where I am. Honestly, I am scared. Scared of what might happen if I step out from my comfort zone. life has been so hard on me and despite all that, I am grateful that I made out of it alive. There are times when I thought I might kill myself, living in a 7 floors building with an easy access to the emergency staircase and leaped off from the top of this building. I've been living here in the past 11 years so there were so many chance to do that but I didnt do it. my mom lost two of her children, my younger sister's twin were stillborn and my brother died two months after he turned 22. I can see that she's still grieving about what happened to my brother. she often said, parent shouldn...
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Its a mistake But I enjoy to walk on it Its a wrong way But there is nothing i can say There's one thing comes to mind.. Upset... Sad and troubled Thinking that there is no chance Wondering if there's still minute less Or even time to reverse the day Return to where it begins And end it before it start The beginning is about to begin But Its better to end Let it die before it blooms Because this heart doesnt want the knot This feet just want to run from the spot Its happy to know, we will be away... Its lucky to think, I wont have to say Voices inside the head, echoes in the heart And there's no space enough to contain Let it burn, let it be gone Because it doesnt say that we are bound And there's no place to run I'm buried down under the piles of rubble And somehow, I feel lucky Thank you for the pain... thank you for the struggle Because that's the story of my life...
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